The Sellers' Honeymoon Travelogue
by Ethan Sellers
Head for the Hill Towns... Orvieto
Orvieto Day One:
With a little bit of anxiety, we figured
out how to read the train schedules, buy
ourselves tickets, and get on the right
train at the Rome Termini Train Station.
The train we took from there was the most
"vintage" of the trains we took.
Having been warned by our travel guides
about hustlers and pickpockets, we managed
to avoid any such issues until a young man
"helped" us get our suitcase onto the
train without being asked to do so, then
followed us to our seats to seek
compensation. I told him we never needed
his help, didn't ask for it, and sure as
hell weren't going to pay him for it. Too
bad our visit to Rome ended that way.
Arriving in Orvieto, we met a helpful
Bostonian at the funicular (no, I'd never
heard of a funicular before this, either)
that carried us up the side of the steep
hill/cliff from the train station to
Orvieto. He gave us some good advice
about places to eat//go.
The views of the Tuscan countryside from
Orvieto are really stunning. Along with
the views we would see a few days later in
Cinque Terre, the views from Orvieto would
tend to support a cynic's observation that
Impressionism isn't that huge a conceptual
breakthrough. All you need to do is take
off your glasses while looking at the
Italian countryside, and paint what you
see.
Rick Steves steered us right with
accommodations. We walked over to a B&B
he recommended in his book and got a room.
Actually, the owner's B&B accommodations
were booked, so we were able to rent a
whole apartment, complete with kitchen and
washing machine, for the night - all for
less than we would have paid in the B&B.
It wasn't long before we were hungry, so
we set out for one of the restaurants that
the friendly Bostonian had recommended.
Unfortunately, we were in the midst of
traditional Italian siesta, so that place
was closed. We ended up eating lunch at
Trattoria Etrusca, which proved to be one
of the best meals of the trip. I had
steak w/ artichokes, Lillie had chick pea
salad, and we split a salad that I'm
fairly sure included dandelion greens.
They were plenty prickly as they went
down, but had enough bite to their flavor
that we only needed olive oil as dressing.
We had a nice grassy-tasting Orvieto
Classico to go with our Tuscan meal, and
some tiramisu for dessert. To cap it off,
the waiter was very nice about our
attempts to speak Italian.
Afterwards, we went to Orvieto's Duomo,
which I call the "Beetlejuice Duomo,"
since it has black and white stripes.
Admission to the church is free, but they
charge to view Signorelli's Apocalypse.
Lillie and I thought that this was kind of
weird and arbitrary.
We proceeded along a less scenic street -
one we assumed housed the average Orvietan
- to St. Patrick's Well. St. Patrick's
Well is a technological marvel. Built to
provide a clean siege-proof water supply
for Popes retreating from invasions of
Rome, the well runs very deep and has a
double-helical staircase that allows for
water-bucket-carrying mules to ascend and
descend simultaneously without passing one
another.
After the well, we visited some Etruscan
caves discovered during excavations for a
restaurant. Based on the general lack of
information and air of indecisiveness to
the exhibits we've seen, not all that much
seems to be known about the Etruscans,
other than that they seem to have just
been swallowed up by the Romans.
Afterwards, we employed our pathetic
attempts at speaking Italian to buy
salami, prosciutto, asiago, provolone,
bread, pickled peppers, and some more
Orvieto Classico for a
stay-at-the-apartment dinner while we
laundered some clothes, read, and relaxed
for a few hours.
Our clothes mostly dried, we decided to
pop over to a wine bar Rick Steves had
described as hip and young. It was a nice
place, but a slow night. The staff there
was very friendly and they were playing a
nice jazz station on the web radio. We
were running low on energy, so we called
it a night after glasses of chianti,
Orvieto classico, a Sicilian white, and (I
think) an Italian Cabernet Sauvignon.
Orvieto was considerably chillier than
Rome, so we slept much better. Even the
crazy cat next door didn't wake us up.
After the hustle and bustle of Rome, this
was a much-needed mellower town.
Orvieto Day 1.5:
We decided to check out Orvieto's weekly
street market in the morning, to get some
fruit and (we hoped) bread. We were
successful in the former, but not the
latter. We were tipped off by our
Bostonian friend that the market had been
moved from its usual location, in order to
accommodate a Palio (horse race) in the
main square. Palio is more commonly
associated with Siena, our next
destination.
To get bread to use with the remainder of
the previous day's lunchmeat purchases, we
had to search for a store that carried
nice crusty Italian bread. We one where
the owner was the only employee and worked
the meat counter and register at the same
time, which bogs the works down a bit. We
also managed to get in line behind a bunch
of old folks that had extensive orders,
and called them each out (or held them up)
like it was show and tell. It was a tad
laborious.
A younger Italian woman cut in line to pay
for one purchase and this went without
complaint, so Lillie piped up that we just
wanted one loaf of bread. The shopkeep
accommodated, but a general elderly uproar
ensued. Apparently, if you're Italian and
butt in line, it's one thing, but another
if you're not... We paid, left the change
and got out as quickly as we could.
We returned to our apartment, packed,
assembled our sandwiches, and made our way
back to the train station. Our train to
Siena was more modern, but stopped a lot
and never seemd to go all that fast.
There would be an initial burst of energy
accompanied by higher-pitched motor
sounds, followed by long periods of quiet
travel that almost seemed to be gliding.
It was pleasantly soporific.
Orvieto's Duomo, aka the "Beetlejuice Duomo"
Staring upwards from the bottom of St. Patrick's Well reminded me of The Ring.
"It rubs the lotion in, or else it gets the hose again."
Seriously, though - if donkeys went up and down the stairs, wouldn't donkey-poop find its way into the well water? Ewww.
An Etruscan well.
What a photogenic little old town...
When I think of Tuscany and small-town Italy, this is what I think of.